![]() ![]() Which is perhaps what we should expect from the Necrophiliac Prince of Disney. Snow may later tell the dwarfs that this whole scene was so romantic and how she can’t wait for her prince to someday come and blah blah blah, but do not be fooled, people: Snow White’s first reaction to the Prince’s seduction techniques is terror. Just look at this series of pictures and tell me what tone you think this love story has. The Prince, by contrast, just gets dirty dance close and starts singing about true love.Īppropriately, Snow White gasps and goes running inside the house, as one does. The only reason Prince Charming is slightly creepier is that he actually touches Sleeping Beauty without her consent when he starts dancing with her. Seriously, what is it with these guys? Like Prince Charming, the Prince here spies on a beautiful woman singing to herself all alone, and his reaction-instead of introducing himself face-to-face like a normal human being-is to sneak up right behind said woman and startle the shit out of her by joining in. Snow White and Sleeping Beauty have another thing in common besides bland personalities: they each have their own creeper prince. The best thing I can say about her is that, in the movie, it’s at least Snow’s idea to clean and cook for the dwarfs in lieu of rent, rather than in the original fairy tale, where the dwarfs–who I might mention are fully capable adult men–discover a child in their home who has just barely survived attempted murder and immediately tell her, “If you keep house for us, cook, make the beds, wash, sew, knit, and keep everything neat and tidy, then you can stay with us, and we’ll give you everything you need.” She does get more screentime than Aurora, which I guess is nice, but of course she has very little agency. well, none of the classic Disney princesses have very much in the way of personality, do they? Snow is fairly indistinguishable from Sleeping Beauty, apart from her looks and origin story. I’m not a huge fan of Snow’s old-timey, warbling singing voice, either, but it’s her actual speaking that drives me crazy.Ĭharacter-wise. It’s innocence to the power of a million. Who even talks like that? Snow White’s voice is like pure sugar in sound form. ![]() Naturally, I’ve forgotten some things, like just how annoying everyone is, especially Snow White. Okay, to the movie itself: I really don’t know how long it’s been since I’ve seen Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, but I’m going to guess it’s somewhere around the vicinity of 20-25 years. And while I have a fair number of cheap and less-cheap wigs, I don’t actually have one that’s short and black, so. Well, then, I went ahead and recklessly dyed my hair blonde-ish without thinking of the obviously dire consequences. well, my lips are basically just lip-colored, but I own (slightly melted) red lipstick, so, what could be easier, right? ![]() When I came up with the idea of the Disney Princess Movie Challenge months ago, I figured I’d inevitably do a Five Minute Cosplay of Snow White, considering that I naturally have very, very dark brown hair, a general corpse-like pallor, and. But it makes my hands twitch a bit, so I’ll probably slip up a couple of times.ġ. Go do something else.Īlso, I will attempt to spell dwarves as dwarfs throughout this review, as that was the correct spelling of the time and is actually how the word is spelled in the movie title. you’re too young to be reading this blog. If I can actually spoil you for a 79-year old movie and a centuries-old fairy tale. Thus we have much to discuss, like misogynistic dwarfs, creeper princes, and how Snow White leaves children with very unrealistic expectations about the helpful attitude of forest animals, among other things. (Did you know that there’s a special platinum version of Snow White that’s currently selling on Amazon for $109.95? Admittedly, it appears that Disney included a ton of bonus features, but since I haven’t seen anything stating that the DVD is literally lined with gold, I’m not terribly convinced it’s worth the cost.)Īnyway, I did find a copy, thanks to the fact that my town still has a local video store. Friends, family, bored people who accidentally found their way onto this blog! The time has come for the 2016 Disney Princess Movie Challenge.įinding a copy of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs proved to be slightly more challenging than normal, since it’s not available on Netflix or Amazon Prime and I was deeply unwilling to shell out too much money on a movie where the happy ending is dependent on a dude making out with a dead body. ![]()
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |